Understanding the insidious nature of sextortion scams

Scammers employ a manipulation strategy that involves building trust before exploitation. Psychologist Elize Thesner notes that perpetrators identify vulnerabilities in lonely, grieving, isolated individuals, or those seeking care. Scammers patiently build rapport, trust, and emotional connection, showing interest in their target's challenges.

This leads to a carefully constructed relationship where victims emotionally invest in a non-existent future, viewing the scammer as a confidant and source of comfort. Psychologist and medical doctor Jonathan Redelinghuys explains that many victims seek intimacy in its broadest sense, not just sex. Sexual content often enters the relationship later, appearing as a natural progression.

Emotional attachment can cloud judgment, making it difficult for victims to discern exploitation. Thesner adds that sexual attraction activates the brain's reward systems, reinforcing the relationship and making it harder for victims to recognize warning signs. Scammers also introduce stories of hardship to create a caregiving dynamic, making victims feel like helpers or rescuers.

When the deception is exposed, shame becomes a powerful tool, as fear of public humiliation can outweigh financial losses. Thesner concludes that these scams exploit universal human needs like hope, affection, validation, and belonging, effectively weaponizing them.